The land of milk and honey

It’s silly really, but it made me smile.

First, I went to the bulk food store to buy Burke’s honey. (I’m no honey aficionado, but my husband swears it’s the best.) As I left the store I realized my milk supply at home was running low, so I slipped into the grocery store next door. While walking back to my car, I realized I was carrying nothing but milk and honey.

Sometimes simple moments of gratitude are the best. I basked in the luxury of living in the land of milk and honey.

It’s silly really, but it made me smile.

A tale of three blankets, or accepting spiritual differences

I’m going to show you three blankets.

When my children were born—first my daughter, then my son—I made them each a blanket. Here is my daughter’s blanket now:

Do you think she used this blanket a lot? Do you think it’s been washed a few times? Yep.

My daughter loved her blankie. It went with her everywhere. She slept holding it and dragged it around when she walked. When she started to kindergarten, she tucked into the bottom of her backpack everyday. When she got older and started going on Brownie and Girl Guide camping trips, she didn’t want the other girls to make fun of her for wanting a blankie, so she tucked it into the bottom of her sleeping bag. She felt it as she slept, but her friends didn’t know it was there.

Eventually she stopped sleeping with it. It didn’t go to school anymore. It stayed at home during camping trips.

One day years later when I was leading children’s time at my church I decided to tell this story to the kids. I wanted to take my daughter’s blanket with me to show everyone. When I asked her where it was, she didn’t have to think for a second. “It’s right beside my bed,” she said. She didn’t use it every day anymore, but she knew exactly where it was.

Now I’m going to show you my son’s blanket:

Do you think he used his blanket much? Nope.

My son barely glanced at his blanket. He never slept with it. He rarely picked it up. It never went to school or on any camping trips.

I had made this blanket for my son, and I was a little hurt that he had no interest in it. I wanted him to love it. Why didn’t he need a blanket in the same way his sister did? Sometimes I even tried to push him to use it. When he couldn’t sleep, I’d tuck it in beside him, sure that it would help. He tossed it on the floor. If he fell and scraped a knee, I wrapped him up in it. He shrugged it off. Eventually I was the one who had to adapt. I had to accept that he was going to have his own kind of relationship with his blanket.

But you know what’s really interesting? When I asked him where it was, he didn’t have to think for a second. “It’s right beside my bed,”  he said. He never needed it, but it was a gift of love from me, so he kept it close.

Now, let me show you a third blanket:

This one I made for my daughter when she was about 7 years old when it became clear that the original one was disintegrating. It’s a new and improved version of the first. I thought she would love it.

She would have nothing to do with it. She wanted the comfort of the original, thank you very much, even if it was battered and torn and no longer serve a real function.

I shared this story with the kids at church because I think my kids’ blankets give us an insight into how we need to accept different approaches to faith.

• Some people need to hold their faith close, sleep with it and touch it daily.
• Some people’s needs change over time. When they are younger, they need a strong faith relationship, but when they get older they let it go. Or, some people don’t want faith in their youth, but when they get older or suffer a crisis, they seek it more.
• Some people know right where it’s kept but don’t need it very often.
• If we make fun of other people’s needs, they’ll tuck them away, but it won’t change anything.
• We can’t make people let go of something until they are ready.
• Just because something is new, doesn’t mean it’s better.
• Just because something is old, doesn’t make it right for everyone.
• If something is given with love, people will value it even if they don’t need it every day
• We give our children a gift if they never have to think for a second to know where to find their faith.
• One thing is for sure, we can’t force other people to have the kind of relationship with faith that we want them to have. It’s very personal. Even if we hand-make it for them or hand it down generation to generation, people have to forge their own relationships with faith.

Buddha Board: Live each moment to the fullest

The past is over.
The future may never be.
The present is all that exists.
Live each moment to the fullest.

Those words came with my Mother’s Day present from my daughter: a Buddha Board.

Based on the age-old Zen “Be Here Now” or “Power of Now” principle, the board’s surface holds the water you paint on it, for a short time, and then it dissipates. The user lives in the present, values it, and then lets it go.

I love that it allows me to be creative. I love that if I make a mistake, I watch it disappear into the ether. I love that when I paint something beautiful, I cherish it even more while it’s there, because I know it won’t last.

I put it on my family room end table beside Ganesh. (We are an ecumenical household.) Perhaps using it, or just the sight of it, will help me to live each moment to the fullest.

__________

Visit the Buddha Board site at http://www.buddhaboard.com/

Don’t skip the intro. It’s beautiful, and the background sound soothes. I had the site open while writing this post, and the audio makes me want to leave it open all day . . .

How to respect other (sport) religions

I received this image on one of my social media feeds.

I like what the Salt Project has to say about religious respect. After the hockey events of the past week here in Canada’s capital, I thought that the same principles could apply to our sports religions.

I wrote earlier about the stewpot of hockey rivalry in our area. That was my way of trying to come to peace with residents of my town who support opposing teams. Playoff action creates even more tension. Above all else, people, we need to get along and respect each other. I invite you to adopt the Salt Project’s suggestions:

1. Educate yourself: Find out the history of your own organization and others. If you disagree with an action of someone on an opposing sports team, chances are your research will expose a similar transgression by someone on the team you support.

2. Be amazed or even converted into a better version of yourself: Allow room for awe, no matter the source, or the team. Try appreciating quality plays by either team. I think you will find you feel calmer and happier.

3. Be patient – Don’t form opinions too soon: Let time, or replays, mellow those knee-jerk reactions.

4. Build relationships: Nothing  breaks down barriers like getting to know someone who holds an opposing viewpoint and discovering that they really aren’t so bad. Get to know someone who supports another team and look for something to admire.

5. Keep your sense of humour handy: This is good advice every day, but especially when it comes to sports. Sports are supposed to be fun, for the players and the fans. If animosity ruins the fun, there’s something wrong.

6. Ask questions – Listen: This is part two of Educate Yourself. As you build relationships with other people, suss out the roots of their dedication to their team. Ask them about their past experiences as a fan. Find out what fires their passion. Listen without injecting your own opinions into the mix.

7. Say “I don’t understand – yet”: If you feel strongly about your team, you likely won’t change your allegiances after a few conversations. That’s OK. Some day you might. Leave room for that possibility.

8. Experience how others worship: Step into the milieu of the fans of the opposition. Try on one of their jerseys. Maybe a little of the mojo will seep into you.

9. Honour Convictions – Don’t try to remake people into your own image: The people with whom you build relationships aren’t likely to change your mind after a few conversations, right? You’re not going to change theirs either. Honour their convictions and accept.

10. Eat together, play together, and hold each other’s babies: A game of pick-up road hockey followed by a pizza feast, perhaps? Let your kids play together. Build relationships through food and fun.

11. Embrace mystery: Anything can happen in sports. Open yourself to the mysterious possibilities and embrace whatever comes.

12. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you: Ah, the Golden Rule. Always good to keep in mind.

Above all else, we need to get along and respect each other.

Dandelions, snails and milkweed are wonder-full

I just came in from digging dandelions out of my front lawn. You might think this would be a curse-word inducing experience, but not so. I dug those dandelions out of my front lawn reverently.

Some kids helped to give me a new perspective on these determined plants.

One morning last year I took my Sunday school class outside for a “Wonder Walk.” As we explored our grassy areas and the NCC property nearby, I encouraged the children to consider the two sides of wonder. I asked them to celebrate the things in the world that they thought were wonder-full, and I encouraged them to wonder about things they didn’t know.

The children found wonder in some big, easily noticeable things like motorcycles, our Ottawa city bike paths, and trees. But their search for wonder also prompted them to stop and examine their surroundings closely. They celebrated many things that would normally have passed unnoticed, like a bee in the wildflower garden and a snail still in the shell. We peeled open a milkweed pod and touch the silky white seeds. We invited the monarch butterflies to find the milkweed cluster.

The children also wondered about many things we take for granted. The hydro tower, for example. How exactly does hydro work? I celebrate the light that comes on in my house when I flick a switch, but I can only describe in broad terms how the power gets there. Water is involved, I know that much.

Dandelions peppered the grass beneath our feet that day. We bent close and marvelled at the intricate yellow flowers. We respected the dandelions ability to persist. We appreciated dandelions as food.

Yes, the kids and I agreed, dandelions are wonder-full.

They don’t bother me, and I dig them out of my lawn out of respect for my neighbours, who don’t enjoy them quite as much. But my new perspective makes the job a little easier. Each one I dig up gets a little nod of respect, because I know I’ll never win the battle. No matter how thorough I might be, there will always be one dandelion more.

And that is pretty darned wonder-full.

Easter Saturday: overlooked but, oh, so important

One of the most memorable Easter sermons I ever heard preached had nothing with Good Friday and the complexities of who killed Jesus and why. It didn’t mention the empty tomb or celebrate the renewed presence of Jesus on Easter morning. It didn’t really have much to do with Jesus at all. It was about Easter Saturday and what the people did in the time in between.

Really, it was about us, and what we do with the overlooked but, oh, so important time in between tragedy and triumph.

Easter Saturday: the metaphorical day after loss. The day when the pain is raw and fresh, and we don’t know yet about the joy to come. During the time in between we can’t see joy. We can’t see how it will take form in our lives. We look to the future and see more of the same.

The preacher of this sermon urged us to remember the Easter story during difficult times. When we survive the initial shock and turmoil and find ourselves in the desert of grief that follows, we can keep the flicker of hope alive.

Be watchful. Look for it. Joy will come with the dawn some Easter morning.